Amy and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day

-Woke up late
-Went outside in tennis shoes/ no socks and cropped jeans. It was raining HARD. No Umbrella. No time to chagne b/c i was already late
-Rushed to Richmond HS
-Said I would host meetings on Wednesdays when I'm already really busy
-Rushed to De Anza HS
-Found out my laptop w/ my thesis and all my work info is STILL broken and won't be serviced until i give them something to backup all my data.
-SASI computer not printing at De Anza
-Rushed to doctors
-Spent 20 minutes looking for parking
-Arrived at Doctor's office
-Told my appointment is actually NEXT monday not this monday. (All the rushing at the schools was a result of thinking i had a doctors appointment)
-Drove to class.
-Did nothing while waiting for class to start
-Decided not to go to class
-Got a flat tire
-Called AAA so I could get my spare changed
-GOt my spare changed
-Drove about 12 blocks, got a flat SPARE!!!!!
-Had to get my car towed
-Still waiting for the tire ppl to call me back and tell me when I can get my car so i can actually go to work.

The bright side? My spare could have blown out on the bridge while it was rainy and windy. At least I was in a residential area.

Stalker

I can't get away from my damn thesis! When i'm not working on it, i'm thinking about it. When i sleep or nap, i dream about my thesis. they're not even normal dreams like i'm working on it or i miss a deadline. i just have a list of all these things i still need to do running through my head on repeat. how am i supposed to get rest from that!

Locus Arts

"I Do" For Queer Love

FEATURING:

Danny Nguyen, Humorist
Jennifer Lin, Asian Poster Bride Comedian
"Muni To the Marriage" Short Film by Stuart Gaffney
DJ Toro spinning hip-hop, r&b and old skool classics. and more.

About the Film

"Muni To the Marriage"
February 12, 2004—the day San Francisco made marriage history. A short Muni ride to City Hall suddenly turns partners of 17 years into newlyweds.

During the ride, the filmmaker reflects on the difficulties experienced by his Chinese-American mother and white father more than 50 years ago, who were only able to marry when California’s law against interracial marriage was overturned.

Co-Presented by Harvey Milk Democratic Club and Equality California, SF Chapter
Mar 4, 2006 8:00pm
SPACE180 - 180 Capp Street, 3rd Floor (@17th Street), San Francisco
Admission: $5-7 sliding scale




ON STAGE:

DENIZEN KANE (Typical Cats and I Was Born with Two Tongues, Chicago)
JENRO (San Francisco)
not your average superheroes
with DJ Phatrick on the wheels

hosted by KIWI (Native Guns)

APEX OUT THE BOX is a collaboration with APEX Express (KPFA 94.1FM) and Locus Arts to feature API hip hop artists on the air AND onstage in the community. Tune in every FIRST Thursday of the month from 7-8pm to catch APEX's API Hip Hop program with host KIWI.

Mar 10, 2006 9:00pm
SPACE180 - 180 Capp Street, 3rd Floor (@17th Street), San Francisco
Admission: $7-10 sliding scale

this is kinda cool. Pandora is created by the folks who did the Music Genome Project. you type in the name of an artist you like, and then they create a streaming radio station with artists who have musical qualities similar to the artist you typed in. if there's a new artist you like you click the link to the iTunes store or Amazon. it may have a few kinks. for example i typed in "blackalicious" two different times and it gave me two different descriptions of their musical qualities. it's still neat though. it's descriptions of goapele included mild rythmic snycopation,, minor key tonality, and vocal-centric aesthetic. other descriptives are like clean lyrics, party style, laid back lyrics, clean lyrics, thin orchestration, acoustic drum samples, dry sound... endless!

I'm going through this long, drawn out process of letting go of an intern... basically it's taking a good week and a half from the day i knew i had to let her go until the process is going to be completed (that's the university for you). she graduated from a local high school and was a participant in our program. she also has been an intern for about five years now. we actually started out as interns together. we never became good friends or anything and when i got my career spot i kind of inherited her as an intern form the previous coordinator.

have really mixed emotions right now. her four years with us were kind of messed up-- basically i'm the first supervisor who has held her accountable. since she has been my intern she has done some bad things that i have called her on repeatedly (like being late, not documenting stuff, or lying on time sheets). what she is being let go for is basically speaking her mind to the principal in an extremely rude and arrogant manner in front of students.

did she behave inappropriately? yes, i totally believe that. actually, i was appalled when i heard what she said to the principal. it also jeopardized our program's presence at the school. do i feel like "the man"? a bit. i feel like i am silencing her and her politics. as someone who has felt frustrated w/ the University and silenced by the delicate and apolitical space in which outreach sits, this situation is making me squirm. she is not being let go for the content/ politics of what she said but for WHEN and HOW she said it (and breaking a lot of program protocal). is there a difference? i often feel like, "wtf do i have to watch my words around (enter privileged location here)! Why do people tiptoe around these issues?” hmm, actually in my opinion what the principal did makes sense to me. I don’t feel like she was creating an injustice in the school. And the principal clearly told my intern what the new policies are and why they are in place. But my opinion probably doesn’t matter right? Anyway, I still feel shitty for letting her go (but is that my Asian womanness shying away from conflict? CURSES!) okay, mainly I’m just wondering if I’m participating in political silencing. I’m really unsure right now.

even though i know i have given her more supervision than any one else in the last four years, in general i've been feeling like i haven’t been there enough for my four interns. I’ve been spread too thin between school, working with my seniors, sitting on committees and trying to support my staff. i'm def still on the learning curve of being a supervisor. L

I don’t think any of this post makes any sense. This issue doesn’t even make sense in my head yet! Okay this is the last time I will indulge in stream of consciousness posting… sorry

Answer this please

What makes a good classroom facilitation?

i woke up this morning, checked my email, and found out M has been in the hospital for over a week. His cousin's email says there was an accident and "he's breathing better right now." the ambiguity of this email is scary. i feel like i've been kicked in the face. it really doesn't stop.

WTF?!

Umm okay... how come nobody told me about this?
HR 4437 Border Protection, Antiterrorism, and Illegal Immigration Control Act (sounds disasterous just by the name) was passed by the house in December and is currently in the Senate.

Here are a few tidbits on HR 4437:
-Reduces LEGAL immigration by eliminating the visa lottery which allows 50,000 people a year apply for visas
-Adds 700 miles of fencing at the US-Mexico border
-Makes it a federal aggravated felony to be in the U.S. without proper documentation. This would make it nearly impossible for people to obtain immigration relief
-Criminalizes teachers, hospitals, social workers, clergy, and basically ANYONE who assists undocumented immigrants.

Dianne Feinstein is on the Senate's Immigration Subcommittee, let her know what you think:
Phone:
San Francisco office: (415) 393-0707
Washington, D.C. office: (202) 224-3841

Fax:
San Francisco office: (415) 393-0710
Washington, D.C. office: (202) 228-3954

Rally in Fruitvale

scratch scratch part deux

okay... so my rash... i went to kaiser and found out my rash is rare for young people to get. basically it's common among people over sixty years of age. it is def a result of an immune system that was weakened due to stress. i'm in A LOT of pain. this rash is not just itchy, but also burns like hell. basically it feels like i ahve 500 needles being poked into my skin (a patch of about six sq inches) with superbad sunburn that someone is slapping... it sucks. the rash will be there for 2-4 weeks and i might still ahve the pain after the rash goes away. i'm really sad. i feel so weak that my body would break down like this because of stress. the last three times i've been to the doctor they've diagnosed whatever i had as a result of stress.

anyway, i did all my faciliation questions for Dictee!!! YAY! i'm extremely satisfied w/ my facilitation questions and my pedagogy. basically, my method of faciliation matches the form of the book. it's kinda hard to explain without knowing the book, but i will share them with you in class. i'm so proud of myself.

Asian American Film Fest

Eric Byler's (Charlotte Sometimes) Americanese! aka Shawn Wong's American Knees is the opening film for this years film fest!! YES! AND Joan Chen! is in this film. nice... the film is 35 bucks since its the opening night film. last year i missed The Motel, thinking it would get picked up and distributed... still waiting. no freaking way i'm waiting for Americanese. sign up to volunteer to watch movies for free!

scratch scratch

i have a rash. i know that sounds gross. it is gross actually, but it's not from bad hygiene or anything, just stress. :(

anyway, i'm planning on spending Friday night working on my thesis. i know this sounds boring, but i'm actually excited to have time to do some work. i've had some exciting ideas and a want to do research (!), unfortunately, everytime i think i'll have time to do school work, work work intervenes. I'm hoping to have two additional lesson plans by monday evening

also, i got some hot curriculum for on social justice issues that i'm going to use this summer w/ my students..... :)
-- -- -- --
frusterated as shit with Richmond HS. i'm recruiting for EAOP... trying to boost by 150 kids to 500 kids. yeah right. anyway, 7 potential students i spoke it are still stuck in ELD 5, despite having A- or better in their English 1 or 2 course, scoring in the 75% or higher on standarized tests, and already passing the damn CAHSEE. COME ON!!! it doesn't help that 5 of the 7 kids are undocumented, so you already know that parents are not gonna make a fuss to the counselors and teachers. i'm slowly finding the advocates on campus and hoping they can help me with these students (the counselors at RHS, don't talk to me and are dismissive of me)
-- -- -- --
i was at el cerrito high on tuesday, my first day at the school since the Friday night stabbing of a former ECHS student. out of 100 people at the party, still nobody has come forward to identify or even descrive the killer. tuesday at ECHS was strange. it was business as usual, actually more celebratory b/c of valentines day. in my past year and a half in this district, every time a student/ former student has been murdered (i think 6 times?) there have been memorial posters, reward posters, Tshirts, etc. i saw nothing on tuesday. i'm unsure why this murder is different.

monday monday

i really don't know what the hell is going on with my students... Beyond senioritis, some are dealing with drug abuse, abortion, homelessness, and depression as a result of past sexual abuse. Many have stopped going to class and are about to fail a few classes. it sounds really crappy to be like, "well don't forget you need to keep your grades up for colleges!" but i have to. they all want to go to college so freaking bad(ly). I'm trying to find a better directory of mental health services in West Contra Costa. most of the services at their schools suck and sometimes aren't culturally sensitive. Asian Mental Health Services has been a great referral, but i need to find some resources in the latino and black community. lemme know if you got some...

i also didn't go to class today. too tired. last week i had a slight breakdown. i don't know why. i went into my sister's room and started crying about work and school. i don't know why i was crying though. at that point i really wanted to quit school. i'm trying to be motivated to go to do my work. i did one lesson plan this past week so i did something. also, i did have an exciting idea for my thesis. it's actually not my idea at all. it's from an undergrad class i took in education. we're gonna come up with our own accountability shit. this worked really well as part of community building.

my ed folks: I need facilitation stuff on popular eduation, articles on the Asian American movement/ Asian American historiography, more lit from SEA, SA, LGBTQ, mixed race writers.
i need more lit... i was thinking of leaving 2-3 books unplanned/ unassigned for folks to decide as a class?

i'm so glad i'm exempt from the protocal. i was checkin out Rom's forms and it's crazy anal.

what's going on?

Some people have asked me to start a myspace but... out of paranoia i decided against it. i don't like the idea of not knowing who's reading my shit, so back to blogging.