Seaside, Ca

Sometimes, when I leave my Bay Area bubble the world slows down. It’s like being a hunted animal in the wild. My hair pricks up, my senses heighten, and I get on edge. Okay, that might be a little dramatic but that is similar to how I tend to feel.

Friday, on my way to Monterey, I made a pit-stop in Seaside, California. We were tired and hungry and ended up stopping at a McDonald’s for a quick bite. First mistake? Stopping in a place called Seaside. Second mistake? Stopping at a McDonald’s in Seaside. Like I said, when I end up at a place outside the Bay, specifically a place with an obvious lack of color, I get a little sensitive.

Now let me be clear. When I saw I get sensitive I mean that I often interpret too long looks, off-color comments, etc as racist. But this also means that I get all anthropological and shit as well. I often find myself observing white folks in predominantly white areas and find some bizarre behavior—almost like I’m watching TV.

For example, at the Seaside McDonald’s there was this middle-aged lady w/ two kids who were probably 7 or 8 years old. The lady was wearing a purple tie-dyed tank top with no bra. Now this may sound sexist, but I’m going to say it anyways: Sometimes women just need to wear bras. Anyways, it was so interesting. I found myself observing this small family. The mom was super-rude and demanding to the McDonald’s worker. One of the kids was a total brat, demanding change to put in the McDonald’s charity box for children. When the mom wouldn’t give him change, he threw a tantrum. He held onto the nailed-down box, shook his body like he was epileptic, and whined, “I WAAAANTTTTT CHAAAANGE NOW!” After his whining made no difference, he turned to his mom and asked, “Who are these kids anyways? And why do they need change?” That was pretty funny.

After we got our food, my sister and I sat down to eat and tried to make small talk. I say tried because we kept getting distracted by the people around us and exchanging “WTF?” looks. I turned my head and there is a father and son. The father definitely could be a NASCAR fan. Because my senses get heightened in this type of area I could clearly hear him chew his food. He devoured his food. All other noises ceased with the exception of his chewing and slurping. I turned my head and saw this elderly couple. They were eating S-L-O-W-L-Y… I couldn’t tell if my mind had slowed down their actions or if they were actually moving that slowly…

It’s kind of funny that I do this, because I KNOW some white folks do that to my family as well. “Why the hell are those Chinese people jabbering so loudly?” “How do you eat, what is called? KEEEEM-CHEEEE? You know that spicy stuff? It smells so bad!” It’s amusing to be on the other end.